Making Farting Noises with your Armpit is Immature

Michael Vick: A short play by Sarah

Federal Prosecutors: Um, you're in trouble, Mr. Vick. J'accuse!
Michael Vick: No way. I'm innocent.
Federal Prosecutors: We mean it.
Michael Vick: No way. I'm innocent.
Federal Prosecutors: Your friends just pleaded guilty.
Michael Vick: No way. I'm screwed. And maybe a little guilty.

The end.

Sadly, it is not the end. As you may have heard, Michael Vick pleaded guilty to federal dogfighting charges, and apologized. To paraphrase, he basically said that everyone makes mistakes, and that he was immature.

I've made mistakes. Who hasn't? But somehow we've all managed not to torture animals for fun. Immature? I think the word he was looking for is inhumane.

Now, to be fair, I've only seen the story on TV, so I'm sure I don't know the whole story. The news media have a habit of saying that they have "the latest," but only seem to regurgitate the same sound bites. Still, I think we get the picture. Even if Mr. Vick didn't actually kill any dogs, as he claims (though he previously claimed that he was innocent), he was part of the operation, and gave us a pretty good glimpse of his character. I hope his sentence includes a lot of community service, preferably picking up poop at an animal shelter.